A Penny Saved

Chris: Hi, this is Chris. Welcome to Adventures in Odyssey, where wonder, excitement, and discovery are just around the corner. Are you ready? Come on, let's go for another adventure in Odyssey.
Bill: And the county commissioner refused to comment on the specific allegations, stating only that the ethics committee will give a full report in about six weeks. In other news, we have the latest from the federal courthouse in Connelsville, where at least one part of a contentious case about counterfeiting has concluded with a jury's verdict. Let's go to Ted Humphreys on the scene. Ted?
Ted Humphreys: Thanks, Bill. I'm at the federal courthouse where the trial of Dr. Benjamin Trask has reached a dramatic climax. After only two hours of deliberations, the jury found Dr. Trask guilty of all 20 charges, including counterfeiting, conspiracy, kidnapping, and forgery. I spoke with several people involved in the case. Detective Don Polehaus led the investigation of what has been called the Green Ring conspiracy.
Detective Don Polehaus: I couldn't be happier with the verdict. Well, actually I could be, but to do that would involve reintroducing the kinds of punishments they used back in the Middle Ages. Good times.
Ted Humphreys: I also caught up with Connie Kendall of Odyssey, who appeared as a witness for the prosecution.
Connie Kendall: Seriously? Well, yeah, I think it was a good verdict. I mean, you can't have people like Dr. Trask running all over the country making their own money. That's the government's job. I mean, what would we have if regular people started doing the government's job?
Wooton Bassett: Democracy?
Connie Kendall: Yes! No, what?
Ted Humphreys: Wooton Bassett, also from Odyssey and personally involved in the case, gave us his take on the verdict.
Wooton Bassett: Thanks, Ted. Did you see the size of the judge's gavel? That thing was huge. I'd love to have one of those at home. Oh, yeah, the verdict. Okay, that was a good call. The jury foreman had great diction when he read it out. Very Shakespearean.
Ted Humphreys: And I was able to talk to Penny Wise, a former student of Dr. Trask's and a key witness at the trial.
Penny Wise: Dr. Trask was a good teacher and a good friend. So I'm not pleased that he did what he did, though I guess jail is what has to happen to someone who lies and steals and forges money and leads people astray.
Ted Humphreys: They say you were the star witness, the one who persuaded the jury to find him guilty.
Penny Wise: I don't want to think about that. In fact, I don't want to talk about it anymore.
Ted Humphreys: Dr. Trask will be held without bail until his sentencing in two weeks. Meanwhile, the trials of Archie Hagler and other members of the Green Ring conspiracy will continue. This is Ted Humphreys at the Connelsville federal court.
Detective Don Polehaus: Well, I'm glad that's over with. All hail the conquering hero!
Wooton Bassett: Detective Polehaus.
Detective Don Polehaus: Oh, hi, Connie, Wooton.
Connie Kendall: Howdy, Whit.
Detective Don Polehaus: Hi. I just heard you on the radio from Connelsville.
Wooton Bassett: Really? Well, that's amazing, which means we're either really fast drivers or that radio has a really slow signal.
Detective Don Polehaus: Step up to the counter, folks. Everyone can order whatever they want. I'm buying.
Connie Kendall: Oh, that's generous.
Detective Don Polehaus: This is a celebration. As long as I can get an expense receipt, Whit, okay?
John Whittaker: Sure thing. What's everyone having?
Connie Kendall: My usual.
Detective Don Polehaus: I'll have my usual too.
Wooton Bassett: And I'll have both their usuals but with extra whipped cream and a side of licorice.
John Whittaker: Coming right up.
Wooton Bassett: Thanks.
Connie Kendall: Oh, and Penny will have her usual too.
Wooton Bassett: Right. Actually, Connie, I don't think she will.
Connie Kendall: She wants something else?
Wooton Bassett: No, I don't think she's coming.
Connie Kendall: She's going to miss our celebration?
Detective Don Polehaus: She can't do that. She was our star witness. She made the case against Trask and his gang.
Wooton Bassett: Oh, I know, but she said she had something else to do and then drove off in the other direction.
Connie Kendall: That's no good.
Wooton Bassett: Yeah, I think she was upset.
Connie Kendall: Upset? Why do you think that?
Wooton Bassett: I don't know, maybe the tear-filled eyes, the quivering lip, and the restrained sobs were kind of a giveaway.
Connie Kendall: What?
Wooton Bassett: Well, I offered to go with her, but she said she wanted to be alone right now.
Connie Kendall: And you listened to her?
Wooton Bassett: Well, yeah, I take it as a pretty good hint that being with her would work against her desire to be alone.
Connie Kendall: Oh, brother. Where's my cell phone? I'm going to call her.
Wooton Bassett: So what do you think upset Penny?
Detective Don Polehaus: Well, it had to be the lack of raspberry sodas in the vending machine at the courthouse.
John Whittaker: No, I've seen it happen before. It's the release after a big court case ends. Sometimes I go back to my office and cry like a little girl.
Wooton Bassett: Really?
John Whittaker: No. But it's emotionally hard work being on the witness stand day after day, testifying against a man you once considered a friend.
Connie Kendall: Penny isn't answering her phone. I hope she's all right.
John Whittaker: Three usuals, one with extra whipped cream and licorice.
Wooton Bassett: Thanks, Whit. Excellent.
Connie Kendall: Wait, this is all wrong.
John Whittaker: Is it not your usual?
Connie Kendall: You put the strawberry ice cream on the wrong end of the bowl. No, Penny should be here. How can we celebrate without her? I'm worried.
Wooton Bassett: Yeah, me too, but if it's any consolation, I'm meeting her this evening. We're going to a movie.
Connie Kendall: Oh, well, that's good. And you'll be sure to tell me if anything's wrong, right?
Wooton Bassett: Count on it. Something is wrong, Connie. Something is seriously wrong.
Connie Kendall: Penny said that?
Wooton Bassett: Well, she might have if she showed up for the movie last night, but she didn't.
Connie Kendall: She stood you up?
Wooton Bassett: No, actually I was more sat down than stood up since I was at the movies by myself.
Connie Kendall: Well, why didn't you call me?
Wooton Bassett: Because I didn't know you were a fan of "Buck Ramrod: Galaxy Explorer to the Universe, Federation, and the Stars."
Connie Kendall: Have you tried to reach her today?
Wooton Bassett: Sure, over and over. I have left more messages than I have words to say in them, which means there's a lot of dead air on her voicemail.
Connie Kendall: This isn't good.
Wooton Bassett: I know, I keep telling myself that maybe she's busy getting ready for the next semester at the college. I would imagine the job of a teaching assistant really gears up about now, what with preparing for new students, ordering the supplies, and making up lists of pranks to play on the first-year students.
Connie Kendall: But she was Dr. Trask's teaching assistant. Did one of the other art teachers take her on?
Wooton Bassett: You may recall that I haven't seen her to be able to answer that question informatively.
Connie Kendall: I mean, it's silly that we're supposed to be her friends and we don't know.
Wooton Bassett: Well, we don't often talk work. Like, I have no idea what your schedule is here at Whit's End. You're here and then you're not.
Connie Kendall: I think we should drive over to the college and find her.
Wooton Bassett: You seem to leave without anyone watching the counter. I mean, what kind of business is that?
Connie Kendall: Are you coming?
Wooton Bassett: Just say the word and we'll go.
Connie Kendall: Hurry.
Wooton Bassett: That was it.
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Connie Kendall: Well, since no one answered at her room, I was sure she'd be here.
Wooton Bassett: Yeah, you'd think, since this is her favorite cafe and it's fast becoming mine, too. They make a great pepperoni panini.
Connie Kendall: Any sign of her?
Wooton Bassett: Not unless she's hiding in the all-you-can-eat salad bar.
Connie Kendall: Look, there's that Professor What's-his-name.
Wooton Bassett: I don't know.
Connie Kendall: Yes, you do. He teaches art.
Wooton Bassett: I still don't know.
Connie Kendall: Sure you do. He testified on behalf of Dr. Trask.
Wooton Bassett: I'm no closer to knowing.
Connie Kendall: Yes, you—Bruce. Professor Bruce.
Wooton Bassett: Professor Bruce.
Connie Kendall: Professor Bruce. I told you you knew him. Professor Bruce!
Professor Bruce: Oh, yes. Oh, it's you.
Connie Kendall: Me? You know me?
Professor Bruce: You testified against Dr. Trask. Real travesty of justice.
Connie Kendall: But he was a counterfeiter.
Professor Bruce: Oh, that's your opinion.
Connie Kendall: Opinion? How can you call that fact an opinion?
Wooton Bassett: Connie, let's stay with our original purpose for being here.
Connie Kendall: Oh, yes.
Professor Bruce: Oh, yes, and you testified against Dr. Trask, too.
Wooton Bassett: Oh, yeah, but that was only because he kidnapped me and locked me in a train car with the counterfeit money. But I got out when the train crashed.
Connie Kendall: Look, we don't want to rerun what happened with Dr. Trask.
Wooton Bassett: Although we could if you want us to.
Connie Kendall: We're looking for Penny Wise.
Professor Bruce: Oh, her.
Wooton Bassett: Professor Bruce, do you put that "oh" in front of all your sentences for dramatic effect?
Connie Kendall: Do you know if she'll be the teaching assistant for another teacher now that Trask is, well, you know?
Professor Bruce: I don't know of anyone who will take her on as an assistant now.
Connie Kendall: Why not?
Professor Bruce: Who wants to work with a girl who will be watching over your shoulder every minute and who may testify against you in court?
Wooton Bassett: I would, apart from the testifying in court part.
Connie Kendall: That's crazy. She didn't watch over anyone's shoulder.
Wooton Bassett: Well, actually she did when the students were doing their art assignments.
Connie Kendall: And Dr. Trask was a criminal. Penny was only doing what was right by testifying.
Professor Bruce: Say what you want. She doesn't have a job in the art department.
Connie Kendall: Meaning that she won't have a job anywhere on campus?
Professor Bruce: More than likely. Now, if you'll excuse me.
Wooton Bassett: But Connie, if Penny doesn't have a job here, then—
Connie Kendall: Let's try her room again. This is ridiculous. Where is she? I don't know what to do.
Wooton Bassett: I suppose we could write another note and put it on top of the first note that we left. That may emphasize our desire to see her, sort of like a visual form of italics, which, as an artist, Penny will understand.
Connie Kendall: Maybe we should get whoever is in charge of this dorm to open the door for us. I want to make sure she's not in there.
Wooton Bassett: Well, let's ask this chipper young gentleman here.
Connie Kendall: Good idea. Excuse me.
Guest (Male): Yeah?
Connie Kendall: Where's the supervisor of this building?
Guest (Male): Oh, his office is over in the maintenance building on the other side of campus. Why, are you looking for Penny?
Connie Kendall: You know her?
Guest (Male): Sure, but you won't find her in there.
Connie Kendall: Why not?
Guest (Male): Oh, she had to move out.
Connie Kendall: Move out?
Guest (Male): No one would hire her as a teaching assistant, so she had to vacate the room. College policy, unless she wanted to pay for it like any other student, which she couldn't afford.
Connie Kendall: Well, you know an awful lot about Penny's private business.
Guest (Male): Hey, this is a college dormitory. There's no such thing as private business. Besides, we all know what Penny did to Dr. Trask.
Connie Kendall: You mean what Dr. Trask did to Penny and just about everyone else around here. She's a hero and you're making her out to be the villain. What is wrong with you people?
Guest (Male): Hey, hey, hey, we're students. Moral angst is what we do best.
Wooton Bassett: Do you have any idea where Penny might have moved?
Guest (Male): Not a clue. She packed up her things and left without saying a word. Though she left a vase filled with buttercups.
Connie Kendall: Oh, she must have left a forwarding address with someone.
Guest (Male): Oh, you can check with the registry office.
Connie Kendall: Thanks, we'll do that.
Guest (Male): Hey, you know, you're kind of cute. Would you like to have coffee sometime?
Connie Kendall: I'm not attracted to guys with moral angst.
Guest (Male): How about moral ambiguity?
Connie Kendall: What do you mean by that?
Guest (Male): It depends.
Wooton Bassett: We'll be leaving now.
Guest (Female): Okay, here's the file for Penny Wise.
Connie Kendall: What's it say?
Guest (Female): We're not supposed to give out this kind of information.
Wooton Bassett: Oh, that's all right. We're not supposed to ask for it either, but we are, so I guess that makes us even.
Guest (Female): There's no forwarding address.
Connie Kendall: Nothing?
Guest (Female): Only a blue Datsun hatchback.
Connie Kendall: What?
Wooton Bassett: Penny drives a blue 1981 Datsun 210 hatchback. But that's not a forwarding address.
Connie Kendall: Yeah, if it was, I'd have a hard time delivering any mail to her unless I wore my running shoes. Okay, thanks.
Guest (Female): No problem.
Connie Kendall: What does that mean, Wooton?
Wooton Bassett: Well, she said she wanted time alone. Maybe she meant a lot of time.
Connie Kendall: Do you think Penny is the sort of person who'd be in trouble but wouldn't tell anyone she's in trouble?
Wooton Bassett: Well, I think she's the sort of person who wouldn't tell anyone she's in trouble because she wouldn't want anyone to go to any trouble for her.
Connie Kendall: Well, we have to find a way to help her.
Wooton Bassett: You mean find a way to find her so that we can then find a way to help her.
Connie Kendall: Oh, stop that.
Wooton Bassett: Well, I'm only using frivolous humor to mask my deep, unbridled worry about her.
Connie Kendall: Seriously?
Wooton Bassett: Good mask. Thanks, I practice in front of a mirror. You know, when everything went wrong with Dr. Trask and I saw how vulnerable Penny was, it was all I could do to keep from locking her up somewhere safe to protect her. But then I realized that locking her up against her will would probably make her really nervous and give her a bad case of déjà vu. But now I wish I'd done it. We can't protect the ones we love, you know? Not really.
Connie Kendall: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, did you say love? I never said the word "love" out loud, did I?
Wooton Bassett: Your secret's safe with me, Wooton. Now, one way or another, we have to find Penny. But how?
Guest (Male): Excuse me. Excuse me.
Penny Wise: Oh. Hello, officer. May I help you?
Guest (Male): Maybe the better question is, may I help you?
Penny Wise: Oh, no, thank you. I'm all right.
Guest (Male): Ma'am.
Penny Wise: Yes?
Guest (Male): I'm sorry, but you can't stay here.
Penny Wise: I can't?
Guest (Male): No. If you read the sign over there, the big one—see that? It says Rules for McAlister Park, right? You'll see that you can't park here overnight.
Penny Wise: What good is having a park that you can't park in? Besides, they wouldn't let me park by Gower's Field either.
Guest (Male): I know, it's a city ordinance. Sorry, ma'am.
Penny Wise: That's okay. It's not your fault. Wait, you're Penny Wise, aren't you?
Penny Wise: That's not your fault either.
Guest (Male): What are you doing out here like this?
Penny Wise: Like this?
Guest (Male): Yeah, you look like you're living out of your car.
Penny Wise: Living out of my—oh, no, that—that wouldn't be right, would it? I mean, that would be really sad, living out of a car, really.
Guest (Male): It sure would be, especially for a hero.
Penny Wise: Hero?
Guest (Male): You stood up to Dr. Trask. You testified against him, and now he's going to jail all because of you.
Penny Wise: All because of me.
Guest (Male): You know what? Wait here for a minute.
Penny Wise: It's okay, officer, I can move. I think I have enough gas. Although I might need a jump for the battery; my hairdryer keeps draining it.
Guest (Male): No, you stay where you are. I'll be right back.
Penny Wise: Okay. Oh, should I wind up my window, officer? No? Okay, I'd better leave it down. I'll never get the smell of last night's curry out of here. Oh, that's weird. I never noticed this button before. I wonder what it does? Officer, look! I opened the back! I opened the trunk! Now I can get to the spare gas can!
Guest (Male): Miss Wise, you have to come with me.
Penny Wise: Really? To where?
Guest (Male): The station.
Penny Wise: You're arresting me? But it's my first offense. Honestly, I never parked here overnight before, and I promise I won't let it happen again.
Guest (Male): Please, lock up the car and come with me.
Penny Wise: But I just got the trunk open! Do you know how long it took me to figure that out?
Guest (Male): I'll help you close it.
Penny Wise: Oh, thanks. Hey, are you going to read me my rights?
Guest (Male): Only if you want me to.
Penny Wise: Oh, yes, please. I've always wanted somebody to do that. My parents almost named me Miranda, you know.
Guest (Male): I didn't know.
Penny Wise: True story.
John Whittaker: I can't imagine that Penny would leave town without saying goodbye.
Connie Kendall: Well, that's the thing, Whit. We don't think she has left. She's here somewhere, but we don't know where.
Wooton Bassett: Well, has anybody checked the Imagination Station?
Connie Kendall: What?
Wooton Bassett: Well, just a guess, but people seem to get lost in there all the time, and she said she'd love to meet Rembrandt one day.
Connie Kendall: I wouldn't blame her for leaving. The way they talked about her at the college, like she'd done something wrong by doing the right thing.
Wooton Bassett: Now, if I were a blue Datsun hatchback, where would I hide? We could call Detective Polehaus and file a missing person's report.
John Whittaker: Actually, I was thinking that he could have his officers look out for Penny's car.
Wooton Bassett: That's right. He could put out one of those CBs or ADTs or HMBs or whatever they're called.
Connie Kendall: I feel so bad for her. She lost everything she cared about.
John Whittaker: Well, not everything. I'll give Detective Polehaus a call. Hi, this is Whit's End. John Whittaker here. Oh, hi, Detective Polehaus.
Wooton Bassett: Now, what were the odds of that happening?
John Whittaker: You are? He's calling about Penny.
Wooton Bassett: And the odds of that happening must be astronomical. What about Penny?
John Whittaker: Go on, detective. Really? Okay, we'll be right there. Thanks.
Connie Kendall: Well?
John Whittaker: He wants us to come to the station.
Connie Kendall: The station? Why there?
John Whittaker: Penny is in jail.
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Connie Kendall: She's been living in her car?
Detective Don Polehaus: It's sad but true.
Connie Kendall: Oh, that is sad, especially when the car is a 1981 Datsun 210 hatchback.
Wooton Bassett: But why didn't Penny tell us she was in trouble?
Detective Don Polehaus: I've seen it happen more times than Wooton can count.
Wooton Bassett: Six?
Detective Don Polehaus: Exactly. Penny feels guilty for putting someone who was once a trusted friend in jail.
Connie Kendall: But according to the jury, he deserved it.
Detective Don Polehaus: Yeah, but that doesn't change how Penny might feel. It weighs on her that she betrayed her friend, even though he turned out to be a lying, deceitful, corrupt—
John Whittaker: Detective.
Detective Don Polehaus: And she feels that the rejection she got from the college is exactly what she deserved. Their attitudes and actions only confirmed what she was feeling deep inside.
Connie Kendall: Well, that doesn't make any sense.
Detective Don Polehaus: Oh, come on, Connie. You know better than most that feelings don't always make sense.
Connie Kendall: True. What? Why would I—
Detective Don Polehaus: I brought Penny here to the jail under the pretense of keeping her safe.
Wooton Bassett: Oh, that's what I wanted to do, but I didn't actually have the jail.
John Whittaker: So it's all right for us to see her?
Detective Don Polehaus: Sure, if you can get in.
Connie Kendall: Is it that crowded?
Detective Don Polehaus: You better believe it.
Wooton Bassett: You have that many criminals?
Detective Don Polehaus: Not criminals. Police officers! When they found out Penny Wise was here, they wanted to celebrate. All right! All right, calm down. The prisoners in cell block D are complaining about the noise. Penny, you have visitors.
Penny Wise: I do?
Connie Kendall: Hi, Penny!
Wooton Bassett: Hi, Penny!
John Whittaker: Hi, Penny.
Wooton Bassett: Look, I finally got to wear one of those orange jumpers!
Connie Kendall: Oh, and you look great!
Wooton Bassett: Wow, I'm so envious!
Penny Wise: I know! Well, you guys have to come in. We can make room, can't we? There's pizza and pretzels and some funny yellow stuff on crackers. Oh, and raspberry soda!
Wooton Bassett: Oh, what about licorice?
Penny Wise: And licorice!
Wooton Bassett: I want to live here! Yay!
Connie Kendall: Penny, you are the only person I know who can turn a jail into a sleepover party.
Penny Wise: It wasn't my idea. They think I'm a hero. Isn't that funny?
Connie Kendall: No, Penny, it's not funny. It's exactly right.
John Whittaker: No, I think we can come up with better arrangements for a hero than living in jail.
Connie Kendall: All you had to do was tell us, Penny.
Penny Wise: I didn't want to be a burden.
Connie Kendall: Well, friends should never be burdens. Now, get your things. You're coming to live with me.
Penny Wise: What?
Connie Kendall: I have the room, and I won't listen to any arguments.
Penny Wise: But it's—it's too much for you to do.
Connie Kendall: I said I won't listen to any arguments. Wooton, didn't I say I won't listen to any arguments?
Wooton Bassett: That's what I heard.
Penny Wise: Oh, Connie. Thank you.
Detective Don Polehaus: Great, that means I can have my jail back.
Penny Wise: I suppose, although I did have a few ideas about how to decorate. A vermillion wallpaper, for example.
Wooton Bassett: Wow, that's a lot of wallpaper.
Connie Kendall: Come on, let's get your things.
Penny Wise: It's all in my suitcase, which happens to be my car.
Connie Kendall: That's okay.
Penny Wise: Oh, great, I left it in the park.
John Whittaker: Thanks for calling us, detective.
Detective Don Polehaus: I had to do something. None of my officers would go out on patrol while Penny was here. Wooton, what are you doing?
Wooton Bassett: I ate all the licorice.
Detective Don Polehaus: Give me an excuse to lock you up and I'll get some more.
Wooton Bassett: Well, I loitered once.
Detective Don Polehaus: Not enough.
Wooton Bassett: I jaywalked!
Detective Don Polehaus: Try harder.
Wooton Bassett: In a no-parking zone!
Detective Don Polehaus: After my license expired! Get out!
Wooton Bassett: I'll just keep an eye on the place until you come back.
Bill: And from the federal court in Connelsville today came the news that Dr. Benjamin Trask, former art professor at Campbell College, will serve 25 years in prison for his role as the mastermind of a local counterfeiting operation. Detective Don Polehaus, who led the investigation that caught Dr. Trask, had this to say.
Detective Don Polehaus: There are few things more satisfying than to see justice done. Now my hope is that the many victims of Dr. Trask's crimes will be able to put the past behind them and get on with their lives.